This morning I received a note from one of my non parental friends about why am I so anxious to get The Wee One out. Her exact words: “Isn’t your life so much quieter and convenient without that crying poop machine on the outside?” I suppose the short answer to that particular question is: yes, of course it’s “quieter” and “more convenient” to keep her on the inside but how dare you catorgorize Baby Elizabeth as nothing more than a crying poop machine! (Clearly my hormones have gotten the best of me.) Which got me thinking about how I felt about pregnancy before I was actually pregnant and I realized—I knew very little. (And I probably owe my friend an apology as I’m totally not the type of person who lashes out at people for not being in the same place in life) so I thought I would list a few things that I never thought about BEFORE I found myself in the throes of pregnancy:
- This baby is growing bigger by the day and the bigger the baby gets the less and less room there is for other things; like food and you know, my vital organs.
- I want to meet this tiny person. Sure, she might poop and cry but after you spend 9 months changing everything about your life and lifestyle to accommodate this tiny idea growing inside, the anticipation of meeting her is all consuming.
- I need to know what this baby LOOKS like–I’ve been envisioning her for 9 months. I’m ready to see if she ended up with straight hair (please please let her have straight hair) or unruly curls that I will need some sort of tutorial on how to properly care. I want to know what color her eyes are and if she will have my nose or daddy’s. I mean, it’s amazing how much you can love something and not have any idea what she even LOOKS like….it’s unbelievable.
- I miss being able to do the simplest tasks. Like picking up my underwear and being able to roll over in my sleep. Somewhere around 30 weeks (or 7.5 months for all my non parental friends) I turned into a turtle and the simple act of rolling from my left to my right became impossible. And since my arms usually fall completely asleep it normally takes a good 2-3 minutes to wake them up, then go to the bathroom, and then settle in on the other side.
- At around 35 weeks (8.5 months) by belly started getting bigger than my body is consciously aware and I started bumping into people and things. Hugs get more complicated and you just generally feel large and not so much in charge.
- I’m ready to eat the stuff that I love. Somehow Baby knows just the foods that make me happy and can ruin them without notice. You like lemon cake? Acid reflux so bad it will make you hurl. Pork chops? Oh, they taste like hot dogs. Chinese food? Don’t even think about it? Meat on pizza? Hello cold wash cloth wiping the puke off your face. It’s the weirdest thing in the world…these pregnancy eating idiosyncrasies.
The list could go on but I do have some work to do today so I will leave you with the primary point of this post: Stop judging me. I’m ready. Let’s do this Baby Elizabeth!
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